Today is one of those days when I can read Ecclesiastes and be like..."Word."
You know?
When you feel like there's no point. When you feel like you have all these plans and you have no way to put them into action when you feel like going around grumbling to yourself and the world,
"Vanity of vanities. All is vanity."
Maybe the reason I feel this way is because it's a new year, I'm 16, and I want things to start changing already. I think I know what I want to do with my life. I've always been interested in writing, and recently I've developed an interest in scriptwriting and film. I've even made a short documentary with my sister Sarah which we entered into a contest (we didn't even place). Nevertheless, I still enjoy doing it immensely and want to pursue it as a career.
I'm sure there are others at the same point as I am. That place where you want to start distinguishing yourself from others by coming up with a portfolio so amazing that no college would turn you down. In my case, I'm striving to come up with an amazing story. Something that no one's ever seen before. And then the feeling of discouragement quickly descends on me when I realize,
"The thing that hath been, it is that which shall be; and that which is done is that which shall be done: and there is no new thing under the sun." (Ecclesiastes 1:9)
Then the questions and fears start flooding you mind. "How in the world can I possibly stick out?!?"
"Is there even a point in trying?"
This is the age where you're supposed to start planning for your future, and let's face it. Sometimes it just seems so futile. I mean, the world is a crazy place. The future is a crazy concept. Everything seems so hard and sometimes even impossible. I mean what would be the difference if you just sat around for the rest of your life doing nothing right? What if you never even tried? It would be easier that's for sure. Especially since,
"As it happeneth to the fool, so it happeneth even to me; and why was I then more wise? Then I said in my heart, that this also is vanity. For there is no remembrance of the wise more than of the fool for ever; seeing that which now is in the days to come shall all be forgotten. And how dieth the wise man? as the fool." (Ecclesiastes 2:15-17)
We all have those moments when we ask ourselves, "What's so wrong about being the fool, huh?"
That's when I have to step back and remember what's wrong about that. God has a plan for my life. It might not be what I'm planning for myself, but there's definitely a reason why I'm here. And if I just stop stressing so much and stop worrying and just do what's right, everything's going to work out exactly how it's supposed to.
But then I get impatient! Why can't it happen now? Why do I feel so stuck? Why is there nothing going on in my life? So I have to realize (again) that everything happens not when I think it should, but in His time.
"To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace." (Ecclesiastes 3:1-8)
So I need to be patient, and wait, and enjoy being a teenager with little responsibilities. That doesn't mean I should stop planning for the future, it just means that I should chill out a little bit and let things happen. However, that doesn't mean I should just do whatever I want because I'm a kid and this is the "time to make mistakes" or whatever either.
"Rejoice, O young man, in thy youth; and let thy heart cheer thee in the days of thy youth, and walk in the ways of thine heart, and in the sight of thine eyes: but know thou, that for all these things God will bring thee into judgment." (Ecclesiastes 11:9)
I suppose the whole point is without God, all is vanity. So on those days when we feel like there's no point and we should give up, we need to realize God is the purpose in this life, and the life after. With Him, our future is sure. With Him we don't have to worry because we are totally taken care of.
So next time you feel like "All is vanity and vexation of spirit", read the book of Ecclesiastes from beginning to end. Read it as many times as you need to to understand that God. Has. A. Plan.
Word.
